Tulsi Gabbard has announced her resignation as director of U.S. National Intelligence. The next position she has lined up shocks noone.
SACRAMENTO -- In yet another blow to the Trump administration Tulsi Gabbard announces her resignation as the Director of National Intelligence. While her tenure in the position was marked initially with skepticism and concern, she did not do much to prove the detractors wrong.
Luckily for Gabbard, her career is not over yet. She is currently on a one-way ticket to Moscow to begin whipping the Russian national hockey team into shape to prepare for the 2030 Winter Olympic Games in the French Alps. Armed with training technique and technology usually reserved for elite US special forces, Russia has all but certainly cinched the gold medal and the re-annexation of Alaska.
When asked for a quote all that the director of the FBI, Kash Patel, had to say was:
"Where are the keys to my car? I'm good to drive."