Cleveland Indians Announce New Name: Cincinnati Indians

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CINCINNATI, OHIO - Well, it has been a long time coming. Various teams have been under fire for years regarding offensive names, based around racial stereotypes. Some have made the choice to change to less charged names, such as the Washington Football Team. Now the time has come for the Cleveland Indians to make the change.

The origin of their name dates back to 1901. Was Andrew Jackson President during the formation of the team? This author failed 7th grade history class, so we cannot confirm or deny who was President of the United States at that time. Regardless, the oppressed have stood up. We congratulate the good denizens of Cleveland to move past the stereotypes of yesteryear.

We all know what the fine people of Cleveland are all about, and it isn’t the stereotype of the 2017 season. The people of Cleveland stand behind what they have always stood for. They stand behind what they support. They will stand behind their believed Browns, and that is a fact of life. The tremendous winning streak of 2017 will no longer haunt their past.

Do we here at fifth quarter sports look down at those of Cincinnati for keeping the worst part of the name? Yes, in fact we do. There are many, many names that could have been chosen. We support the plight of the Native Americans, and will do all in our power to stand behind a proper name change.

The most egregious part of this saga is that the Cincinnati Indians will remain in Cleveland.

Who Wrote This Crap?

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Pope | @MelloFelloYello
Did you play on my drumset?