Local Strip Clubs Petition For Houston Rockets To Not Trade James Harden

Image SourceArticle image

Danny Dimes

2020-12-28


Today in Houston, Local Strip club owners are issuing a plea to the owner of the Houston Rockets to resolve their issues with Superstar James Harden. The disgruntled superstar is pushing for a trade away from the team but local club owners say that if he is moved the damage to the local economy could be devastating.

One club owner went as far as to say, “James staying in Houston is critical to not only sustaining my business, but to the whole downtown area! For all incredible numbers he has put up on the court, the numbers that he puts up at the club have a far greater impact”. There are numbers to back this claim up. According to the better business bureau, James Harden singlehandedly brings in more 20 million dollars in club revenues each year since his arrival in Houston. These kinds of numbers are only comparable to the absolute greatest patrons of the industry. (Future, Offset, Adam Sandler).

Even if Harden was traded for another “generous” player it would take at least three Lou Williams and two J.R. Smiths to match that kind of impact. The absence of these dollars could cause several clubs to close permanently causing lost jobs for 100’s of local dancers, which could be devastating for the local economy and could severely inflate the OnlyFans market. ESPN’s reports that Harden’s preferred destinations are Atlanta, Miami, and Orlando.

Who Wrote This Crap?

Author image
Danny Dimes | @DannyDimes420
Droppin' dimes and squeezing limes.

Comments, Play Nice