SACRAMENTO -- While we discussed in the past that the annexation of Canada into the US would be absolutely devastating for the NHL, we had not considered how much of a boon it would be for the USA Olympic hockey team. It is widely accepted that on the international stage the US's popularity has been on rocky ground, what with the bombing of nuclear facilities overseas and the extra-judicial killings of South American fishermen. The US can take one of two directions.

1. The Chill Out Route

The US could return to a seat of benevolence by refunding things like US AID, international vaccination efforts, scholastic book fairs, etc. Rebuilding the good will that it has recently trashed would be an arduous journey, but it still might not be too late. This however will not help the US Olympic Hockey team.

What will happen is the US not getting gold. It is well known that Bill Guerin is well intentioned by building a roster of killers and psychos, but not star power. However the 4 Nations have tapped Tampa Bay Lightning HC Jon Cooper is building literally Voltron. A well oiled team who's sum is greater than it's parts.

The US has no chance.

2. The "Dr. Evil" Route

Here is where things get interesting. The US annexes Canada, not only removing them from the contention but also absorbing their player base. Keep the team but adding MacKinnon and McDavid would be a no brainer. They'd have to invent a new metal for how well the US team would win. Maybe tungsten or some rare-earth metal like neodymium.

The US's reputation would be shattered irreparably but it would be worth it for that sweet sweet tungsten.

5thQuarterSports does not endorse the US governments threats to annex Canada. But we do think any steps necessary to secure the win are justified.